The text for this week is 2 Corinthians 6:14-7:16.
There is much to talk about in this text, but for me, the verse that stands out is 7:9, which says: "Now I rejoice, not because you were grieved, but because your grief led to repentance; for you felt a godly grief...."
The context of this verse is that Paul wrote the church in Corinth a letter in which he was forced to use "frank speech" and admonish them for their actions. But, it grieved Paul to be forced to use such honest speech. The entire book of 2 Corinthians (at least up until this point) shows Paul trying to explain his actions and reconcile with the Corinthian church.
All of this is of course very important. But even more important for me is the idea of "godly grief." What is "godly grief" and how does it work in our lives.
We all know that confession and repentance is important. One must be honest with God and freely admit faults and failings. But, feeling bad and guilty is NOT where the story ends. If you ask my family and friends they might tell you that I often suffer from an overactive guilt complex. I'm always wanting to apologize for things that are not my fault and/or out of my control. But, that over-active grieving is not the goal here.
When Paul says that "godly grief" is important, he is not just talking about feeling grief for our actions, but he is also encouraging repentance. Repentance is that moment of turning around and re-focusing your life on God. He tells the Corinthians that their grief led them to repentance, meaning they were able to turn around.
Questions for the week:
How would you define godly grief?
When is it important & when do we take it too far?
What can we do to help us in that process of turning around and putting our focus back on God?
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To me, Godly grief is when we fail to live up to His expectations. This is important in holding ourselves to a higher standard than we would normally; but this could be detrimental if we assume God's expectations for us and hold ourselves to a standard unattainable without grace, and yet try to do it ourselves. God grieves when we reject His grace.
We also take it too far when we get bogged down in the middle of the grieving process. Kubler-Ross' Five Stages of Grief are: denial; anger; bargaining; depression; and acceptance. We each take a different amount of time in each step of the process; so as a group we may not always be on the same page. This can cause confusion, stress and misunderstanding. Without acceptance we can't have repentence.
We each need to work through the five stages with God's help, and then reach back and help those stuck in one of the stages. We can do this by showing that the process is finite, that there is hope through acceptance and repentance, and by avoiding the feedback loops of stewing on denial, or anger, or bargaining with God, or depression.
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